- If you haven’t achieved your dreams, it’s your fault
- If you are low on money, it’s your fault
- If you got divorced, it’s your fault
- If the relationship with your kids, co-workers, neighbors or friends is tension filled or less than loving, it’s only your fault
- If you are overweight, not where you wanted to be in your career, not joyful, not mentally and spiritually peaceful, don’t have enough time, feel overwhelmed, overscheduled and frazzled...
Some call it "taking ownership" or "the 100% rule." Tony Robbins might call it something like "personal power."
But essentially taking responsibility means YOU get to choose your own fate (good or bad).
Taking responsibility for yourself means you don't blame the traffic for being late, your significant other for your bad relationship, or the weather for not being able to exercise.
You're the captain of your own ship. You're in charge of your destiny.
If you're a business leader, it means you don't blame your team, the economy, or Donald Trump for your organization's poor performance. It's all on your back.
Example of Taking Responsibility
I recently released a Darren Daily where I retold a story from "The Compound Effect" about a time I had to take 100% responsibility for a mistake I made.
... a VERY big mistake.
P.S. To hear the full explanation of this story (and more!), go here: TheCompoundEffect.com
The Psychology of Not Taking Responsibility
You know what's depressing?
When bad things happen to you.
Wait! That wasn't the depressing thing.
Sure certain things happen to us, things happen to all of us, but what happens to us doesn’t define us. What we DO about it does.
And there's a trap here...
The trap is thinking you are not in control of your life. The "circumstances" are.
This "not taking responsibility psychology" can throw us into a huge funk.
The truth is YOU have the choice to react one way or another to anything life throws at you. That's real power! That's a healthy mindset that will help you win in life.
On the other hand, if you let the "circumstances" win and dictate your life, imagine the depression. Please don't make the mistake of thinking life is happening "to you" all the time and it's all completely out of your control.
Taking responsibility is about choosing to take back that control. It's about realizing that life is happening for you, not to you.
The Hidden Power of "Choosing"
- to eat those donuts
- to take that job or fight for something better
- to say I love you or not
Every choice has an impact on the "compound effect" of your life.
You'll gain success by becoming aware of and making choices that support the expansion of your life.
How I Learned the 100% Rule
- High expectations - A culture of excellence starts with your attitude as the leader, and what type of performance you expect. Poor performance is like an infectious disease. Allow it on your team, and all the members will get it. Set your standards very high.
- I only hire "A Players" - By making my hiring process vigorous, (for example, we conduct multiple interviews, and every team member must submit a video of themselves, which immediately scrubs out 90% of the workforce), I ensure a very high caliber team member.
- I ensure my A player is loved and heard - Your first job as CEO is to be the "Chief Emotions Officer." Listen to your team's dreams and desires, what they love about the job and where they are struggling and actually care, and they'll want to perform for you.
Now that we have a team member who is an A player, and emotionally in the right state, I can expect very high performance from them.
So here's my process for assigning an actual project. I STILL don't leave this to chance. 100% rule, right?
- Clear instructions, the right tools, with a deadline - One of the worst things you can do when you delegate is to assign a project without the specifics of what you want your team to do. Make sure they know exactly what is expected of them, when exactly you expect it to be done, and that they have all the tools and capacity to do it.
- Let them fly - As I've said before, a person's IQ seems to double if you give them a task, tell them you trust them to do it, and then leave them alone to complete it. No hand holding or micromanaging unless their performance doesn't meet my expectations.
After ensuring I have the right team members in place, that they are properly motivated and loved, and have everything they need to complete a project to my standard of excellence, surely now it's their fault if they deliver poor results, right?
Still my fault if that happens.
If performance is still not up to my standards, I go back, ensure they understood the project correctly and had the tools, and I get my hands dirty if I have to. I go along side them and micromanage (only a little) to make sure the job gets done correctly.
If my team member STILL can't perform up to my standards, I must let that team member go. Remember it all starts with high expectations, and if I allow mediocrity or poor performance on my team, it will spread like a cancer to the others.
Like I said, it's 100% my responsibility, and if you're a leader, you should follow the same rule on your team.